Tuesday, August 4, 2009

cos everyone would rather watch you fall...

It's August. The eighth month of the year. Of my eighteenth year on this earth.

I know that i've already posted stuff about this, about how I feel like so much of the year has passed and I haven't actually achieved anything.

But seriously, Lauren reminded me today that we're in August, and I almost cried. Because I'm retarded... But also, because I realised how much time has gone by, and what do i have to show for it? A couple of hundred dollars in the bank? What have I done with my 8 months?

I'll tell you exactly what. I've worked, I've gone to school, I've gone to youth friday nights. I'll occassionally do stuff with friends. I've passed up hundreds of assignments. I've recieved multiple A's and a few B's. I've...

I've spent my days sitting in classrooms, and my nights sitting in front of my desk doing homework. I've spent my weekends working, and I've come home from work, only to sit in front of my desk and do some more homework.

I haven't done anything with my year.

And to be honest, I don't think I have done much with my life.

If I died tomorrow, what effect wouold my life have had? None. Because I haven't done anything with it.... But I don't know what I should have done with it, what I should do with it, or how to do something with my life...


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