and you set boundaries you'd never dream to cross and if you do you wake completely lost...

i think i lay out a lot of rules for my self. shit loads and shit loads of rules and boundaries and crap that i get freaked out about when i mess up... i break promises to myself constantly...

i have so many little things that im very particular about. little things that annoy me, and bug me. little things that i have to do my way or else i just freak out.

i tried, once upon a time, to be a little more easy going, and not to freak out so much when things don't go according to plan... but i just cant do it.

i cant be easy going. i cant deal with the stress of leaving things incomplete, or messy or to the last minute. i cant cope with things being done a different way to the way i would have done it. it just doesnt work that way.

i cant handle it when other people step over my boundaries.

i just cant do it.