Saturday, April 18, 2009

come come come to the river, you are the living water

wash me clean, wash me clean

am i the only one who came back from that feeling completely new and refreshed?

you know... it was just a real shock to the system everything that happened that weekend.

i know that you still dont believe me, and thats okay because if i were in your shoes i dont know that id believe me either. id want to. but i dont think i would. then again im just not very good at trusting people. even those closest to me.

but in any event im glad things are somewhat back to normal there, because i missed you.

it was such a strange feeling sunday night. i didnt know if i was happy or sad or... idk... so many thoughts were running through my head. but as we sat down for hot milo before bed, and i remembered back to last year, the two of us sitting up really late talking with her... and remembering all that we talked about, all that i was feeling at the time, all that was running through my head...

i dont know if i can even explain how amazing that feeling was, the feeling of feeling light and having everythign lifted off my shoulders for just those few seconds.

running into the courtyard with louise i just yelled out 'im alive' and i dont think id ever felt so free in my entire life.

so today i will tell you i am alive. that a year later, i am still alive.

and that amazes me.


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